CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
