Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize