Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize