I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Randomize
