i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize
