Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
