What a fucking waste of an outfit
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Rumble strips road head = magical
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
