i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
