the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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