A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
