It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
