i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize