you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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