I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
