would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
