sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
