I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize