HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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