You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
tonight lets celebrate not being married
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize