I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Randomize
