Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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