oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
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