cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
