he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
so let's talk penis.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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