Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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