big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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