Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
