Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
You ruined the universe
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
