Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
