Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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