Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize