in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
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