I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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