I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
