ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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