i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
