Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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