Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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