Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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