my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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