it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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