I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
