ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize