Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
