She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
