i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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