We named our party play list daddy issues
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
