This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
