I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
