Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
