And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
