ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
